Too bad for me anyone want to have a Grandma?

Talked to a bloke from down under today, my 5 am is his 8 pm. We both blog and I decided to reach out and let him know I enjoyed reading about a young father and their busy life. Mine is rather dull I'm afraid with the kids all grown and moved away. I have one exception, yet she is forty and hardly the type to take up soccer or any sport for that matter, She spends most of her free time, and she has plenty of that on her computer playing games. Sometimes she does live action games where she uses an interactive program and she gets in character, I'll hear her talking in some strange voice from the ohter room and see her sitting wih a blanket wrapped around her in some fashion as if its a shawl and I'll know she's in character.

Me, I don't game, but my husband and I are rapt with the glowing rectangle in our laps as well, He's off on a hunt for an antique coffee grinder that he can buy for cheap and I'm off looking for inspiration and articles to read or wrting up another of these banal blogs to entertain noone but still it gets it out of me. This thing we do on these little white screens that pop out when we feel that urge to spew forth. Yes, its all about the day. Another chicken went into the oven last night and that's all well and good. Yet, sometimes its that sense of doom I feel coming on and my wonder over how I will keep it at bay, Today I talked with a new friend from around the otherside of this vast earth, who blogs about this too, Life ,,,will we ever make sense of it? No. But live it, well yet in these litlle increments someone can see we get it just a little. We feel it and know it has a substance. Its not all soccer games on someother continent I'll never see, and my yard not green this year because of the drought, I like to think its us and we are more than the mundane. At least I hope for that and it keeps the feeling of doom away. Until my next post. - from California the next big desert.

Never look back vs forwver looking

I wanted to hear from you and for a fleeting moment you're there, we've begun to share our inner most secrets. We are no longer chatting about the surface things in life. I love to heare from you, I look forward to our talks and then you stop, I doubt myself, oh why did I share that, was that the thing that made you stay away? What was it that I saiid, anyway that was too much?

Relationshops are hard, you promised to be there forever, no matter what the arrangement, was that just a lie so you would get to know me better? Are you just a cad, a crook, some one who later will want soemething again, but today whose needs are beiing met by soemone closer? Afterall this was never a face to face real intimate one. It was a casual serics on conersations. It was my mistake to share, my mistade to be vulnerable like this. Is this what its liked to be Catfished? I wonder if you were honest with me and just got tired of the game of making up more lies to seem real.

Or were you a real person, who thought again about who I was an was scared to go any further? Who could tell our freindship might go so far that you'd be hurt if taken any farther? At any rate, its too late for me, I have been affected by the lask of response to my text, I lament the relationshop if over. Until I hear from you again.,, dear friend.